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AFM: What was your inspiration for your latest book?

SD: Well, I wrote this book because I felt like American women needed a bit of help. They needed some support, because it’s become so complicated to be a woman. You’re supposed to look like Gisele, be professionally successful and pop out children as well. In the old days it used to be enough to be a homemaker. Nobody can just be a dumb broad anymore; you have to be smart as well, and it’s too much. So I think the pressures on women and the expectations have been multiplied so what every woman needs is a velvet entourage: a bunch of gays to help her achieve these momentous goals. And of course not every woman can have a velvet entourage yet every woman can buy my book which is full of gay wisdom.

AFM: Your husband, John, is he a big part of your writing process?

SD: Yes, I have him read everything when I get it to a certain point and he has great feedback for me. He’s smart. Everything I write, I say ‘OK, I want your feedback now.’ He’s such a good editor.

AFM: You do so many things. From Barney’s, to writing, to guest appearances, you’re everywhere. How do you keep up with such a packed schedule?

SD: My main goal is just to be creatively stimulated. I’ll do the projects that I think are creative and fun, and I’m lucky to have such long relationships, like with Barneys, which has always been an intriguing, fun job. For me, retail itself is very interesting and dynamic. It’s all about the experience and throwing yourself into something.

AFM: What is a secret to success?

SD: Resilience, energy, creativity—that will get you somewhere. I think it’s important to have some achievable goals- and not some insane lottery-winning type goals. Maybe you’re not going to be Miss America; maybe you’ll get on the local weather channel and be the anchor lady. When I was young I used to watch those Busby Berkeley movies from the 1930’s and I’d think, ‘god, how great it would be to be a chorus girl because you have all the fun of being in the show and you don’t have to be the star. You can just tap dance your brains out and smile a lot and have fun.’